Snobbery

“What is a snob? A snob is anybody who takes a small part of you and uses that to come to a complete vision of who you are. That is snobbery.” – Alain de Botton

I have to admit that I’m a huge fan of Alain de Botton.  Although I am by no means an expert on his work and writings (yet), I am extremely drawn to his vision and philosophy.  Why?  Because it hits me in the gut, in my BB belly – simply put, I get it.

We are all guilty of snobbery – the act of looking down upon someone as being less than based on our biased perceptions.  Alain uses the example of job snobbery – when meeting someone and asking what they “do”, we immediately raise our internal judgment flag and label them as worthy of our time or worthless.  It’s that first impression business that we talk about incessantly – how important it is to make a good one.

I have always had a hang-up about business cards as being a perfect example of societal snobbery.  To me,  it always seemed like a grown-up thing – and a little bit self-important.  “Hi, I’m Betty and here’s my card.”  My card was then to identify who I was and what I did.  Most of our titles are inflated versions of the truth – “Admissions Specialist” or “VP of Tech Core Management.”  There are lots of VP’s and Specialists floating out there…it say’s we have value, that we are smart – and  look here, my card proves it.  A business card is nothing more than a cardboard calling card.  It is not you.

In  a dream I had recently, two people who did not like me (for forgotten reasons) were walking away, tossing inaccurate comments about me over their shoulders.  I  strode over to them and kindly expressed that they were being unfair and that they did not know me.  I remember how clearly I spoke those words, “You do not know me.”

It bothered me that someone was speaking of me untruthfully – that they had made a judgment call on faulty information – from their personal prejudices.  It didn’t sit right with me and  I needed to speak up and defend myself.

The truth is, most people do not know the authentic us (except for maybe our mother’s and even that is questionable.)  Some of us don’t even know ourselves very well so how can others?  I am not labels.  You are not your job title.  We are not adjectives.

Our snobbery skills can be useful in the grand scheme – so we may be able to tell the perceived good guys from the bad one’s – to keep us out of harms way.  If snobbery sounds a safety alarm, then listen to it.  Otherwise, put snobbery in your back pocket.  Blow it into your handkerchief and tuck it away where it belongs. 

Hmm – I guess I’m a snob too.  I’m a snob about snobs. – BB 

Read Alain’s work – http://www.alaindebotton.com/ – he’s amazing.